Chronicles of a Jongleur

The first thing that hits you about youngsters (and I suddenly feel ancient at 26) is their die-hard-affliction for LOUD music.

I was walking back to my apartment late last night when a woman scurried past, apparently in a hurry to get going somewhere. It was about 11pm in the night, and the city was as still as a graveyard. She marched away until about she was 10 feet in front of me, braked to a halt and screamed –”Honey, you know how to get to Edison Avenue?”

She was so smashed out and you could literally see her literally sweating vodka. Her IPod was slamming away at full throttle and you could hardly hear her above the damn turbulence of her headphones. What was I supposed to say?

Apparently there is an unsaid axiom amongst this IPod craving crowd – the loudness resonating your ear buds is directly proportional to your coolness quotient (complemented by heavy metal jewelry and holes in your body and face). And they are everywhere, in trains, in buses, at Niagara Falls, on the seat next to you on the airplane, in the cubicle right next to you – heck you can’t even relieve yourself in peace in a toilet booth these days without having a heart attack.

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What’s it with us desis and Japanese cars? Nine out of ten desis I know has a Toyota Corolla/Camry or a Honda Civic/Accord . Have you ever seen an Indian head inside a Pontiac or a Saturn or a Chevy?

Given that scenario, one person I know did the most shocking thing ever seen among desi car shoppers. He got himself a brand new Dodge Ram Pickup truck.

Yes you heard me right, a pickup truck.And yes again – a Dodge at that.

Naturally it needed a wire brush to scrape the bewilderment from my face – and the “non-conformist” duly explained – “Machi all of us desis, take my roomie for example- they get Jap cars because it’s easier to dispose them off when they go back to India. I don’t intend to go back anytime dude. This is home to me.”

Only three years later did I learn that he eventually returned to begin his own consultancy in Bangalore, and that his Corolla trotting roomie had filed his Green card application and had even gotten approval for a $300,000 mortgage.

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Speaking of cars, do you remember the first time you saw an 18 wheeler spewing industrial grade fumes roar past you when you first stepped into the country? And wonder who even managed to create those monstrosities in the first place?

The question I am often asked is, why do all trucks in America look like bald horses? Why are they so huge? Don’t drivers melt when they sit just a few feet away from a smoldering engine that looks powerful enough to generate enough power to light up a small town?

Here is an interesting piece of trivia – Did you know that the most common amount of gears in an 18 wheeler today is 10 forward and 2 reverse gears? However even this can vary with configurations ranging from 9, 10, 13, 15 to 18 gears!

I have learnt these answers over time, but all that needs to be done is to do a quick drive over to Wikipedia to become an expert on trucking, engines and cabs. And of course the old age romanticism associated with truckers’ tales that are enough to keep any audience spellbound.

One question that still intrigues me is this – Why does a trailer on a truck have 20 wheels when only 16 actually roll on the ground and the other 4 are lifted up? Any answers?